Reveal: the anger underneath the anger
- Anger Iceberg — the surface reaction sits on top of hurt, fear, shame, or unmet need. The sheet names what's under the waterline.
- Chain Analysis — walks backward from the outburst to the vulnerability factor twelve hours earlier.
Interrupt: skills for the moment before the behaviour
- TIPP — temperature/exercise/paced breathing when anger is at 8+ on the dial.
- Urge Surfing — for anger that spikes and passes if the client can wait it out for 90 seconds.
- Opposite Action — when the anger doesn't fit the facts, act opposite (soften the voice, unclench the jaw, approach warmly).
Rehearse: the response the client wants to have
- DEAR MAN — scripted assertive request so the client isn't inventing language while activated.
- Boundary Builder — for the recurring conversation where anger keeps arriving.
- Repair Attempts — for the aftermath, when the outburst has already happened.
Worksheets
- Anger Iceberg →
Reveal the emotions under the anger.
- Chain Analysis →
Walk backward from the outburst.
- TIPP →
Interrupt the escalation at 8+ intensity.
- Urge Surfing →
Wait out the 90-second spike.
- Opposite Action →
Act opposite when the emotion doesn't fit the facts.
- DEAR MAN →
Scripted assertive request.
- Boundary Builder →
For the recurring anger-triggering conversation.
- Repair Attempts →
Rebuild after an outburst.
Frequently asked questions
What's the best anger management worksheet to start with?+
The Anger Iceberg. It reframes the target of the work in the first session — the client stops trying to 'control anger' and starts working with the hurt, fear, shame or unmet need underneath. Every other sheet lands better after that shift.
Do these worksheets work for court-mandated clients?+
Yes. The Anger Iceberg + Chain Analysis + DEAR MAN sequence is the backbone of most court-mandated anger programmes, whether the frame is CBT, DBT or trauma-informed.
How do I use anger worksheets with couples?+
Have each partner complete the Anger Iceberg separately for the same incident, then bring the sheets into the joint session and compare what's under each waterline. Follow with Repair Attempts for the specific incident.