DBT · Emotion Regulation

Opposite Action

When the emotion doesn't fit the facts — do the opposite

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When an emotion doesn't fit the facts — or it fits but acting on it would hurt — do the opposite. Fully. All the way. Halfway opposite action doesn't change the emotion.

Emotion

Action urge

Opposite — done fully

Fear

Avoid

Approach — slowly, fully

Anger

Attack

Gently avoid · be kind

Sadness

Withdraw

Get active · connect

Shame

Hide

Tell someone safe · stand tall

Guilt (unjustified)

Apologize / fix

Do it again · don't repair

Envy

Diminish them

Count your own · celebrate them

Your turn

Emotion (and intensity 0–100)

Does it fit the facts?

Action urge

Opposite action — fully, all the way

The bar for "fully"

Posture, face, voice, breathing. If anything stays braced for the original emotion, the brain reads it as half-confirmation.

About this worksheet

Opposite action is the DBT emotion-regulation skill for the moment a client's emotion is either unjustified by the facts or justified but the urge won't help. Fear says withdraw — opposite action approaches. Anger says attack — opposite action gently avoids or shows genuine kindness. Sadness says isolate — opposite action re-engages. Shame says hide — opposite action reveals in a safe context. The skill isn't emotional suppression; it's doing the behavior opposite to the urge, all the way, until the emotion shifts. This worksheet walks the client through the check (does the emotion fit the facts? does acting on the urge fit my goals?), then guides them into the opposite behavior with full commitment — face, posture, thoughts, all of it. Half-hearted opposite action doesn't work; the sheet is explicit about that.

When to use it

Any emotion that keeps a client stuck — chronic avoidance from fear, isolation from depression, reactivity from anger, hiding from shame.
After teaching Check the Facts and confirming the emotion is either unjustified or unhelpful to act on.
In-session for a specific recent situation; between sessions as targeted homework.
Not for emotions that fit the facts and where the urge is protective (grief after a real loss, fear of a real threat).

How to use it

1
Name the emotion and urge
One-word emotion, then the specific action urge that comes with it (withdraw, attack, hide, isolate).
2
Check the facts
Does the emotion fit the situation? Does acting on the urge move the client toward or away from their goals?
3
Identify the opposite action
Not neutral — opposite. If fear says avoid, opposite is approach. If shame says hide, opposite is show up.
4
Do it all the way
Body, face, posture, tone, and thoughts all point toward opposite. Half-hearted opposite action reinforces the original emotion.
5
Repeat until the emotion shifts
Emotions don't turn on a dime. Client stays in the opposite behavior until the intensity comes down — often 20+ minutes.

Frequently asked questions

What is opposite action in DBT?+

A DBT emotion-regulation skill: do the behavior opposite to what the emotion's action urge is pushing you toward, all the way, until the emotion shifts. Used when the emotion doesn't fit the facts or acting on the urge won't help.

How is opposite action different from suppression?+

Suppression pushes the feeling down while continuing the same behavior. Opposite action acknowledges the feeling and changes the behavior — face, body, and thoughts all reoriented toward the opposite of the urge.

Does opposite action work for depression?+

Yes — behavioral activation is essentially opposite action for depression's isolate-and-shut-down urge. Get up, get moving, get social contact, engage with something meaningful. The evidence base is strong.

When shouldn't I use opposite action?+

When the emotion fits the facts and the urge is protective — grief after a real loss, fear of a real threat, guilt after a real transgression. In those cases, honor the emotion or make repair; don't override it.

Is this printable free?+

Yes. Free clinician PDF. Sign in to TherapistAssist to send as a secure client link or add your practice name.

Related worksheets

Emotional Regulation Worksheet for Kids

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DBT

Pros & Cons of the Urge

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Worksheet — Opposite Action — provided by TherapistAssist for clinical use. Not a substitute for assessment or treatment.