Family · Structure
Household Responsibilities & Mental Load Chart
Inventory the invisible labor too
Invisible labor and unequal chore load are among the most reliable sources of family resentment. This sheet inventories all of it — including mental load — and rebalances explicitly.
Visible chores
Task
Currently owned by
Reassigned to
Invisible / mental load (noticing, planning, remembering)
Domain (school, meals, medical, gifts…)
Currently owned by
Reassigned / shared how
Standards conversation
Where we're operating at different standards, and how we're meeting in the middle
Own the whole task
'Helping' means one person still owns it. Rebalancing means fully handing off — including the noticing, the planning, and the remembering.