Family · Structure
Family Meeting Agenda Worksheet
The 20-minute structure that prevents most fights
A weekly family meeting is the single most under-used structural intervention in family therapy. Same time each week, same short agenda, everyone gets a turn. It prevents 80% of the fights that eat evenings.
Setup
Day and time we'll protect (weekly, 15–30 min)
Who runs it (rotate); who takes notes
The standing agenda
- 1. Appreciations — each person names one thing they appreciated this week
- 2. Calendar — what's coming, who needs a ride, who's out
- 3. Chores & responsibilities — what worked, what didn't
- 4. One issue on the table — brought by anyone, no ambush
- 5. One thing we're planning together (fun, trip, project)
- 6. Close with a ritual — song, walk, dessert, high-fives
Ground rules
- No phones
- No re-litigating last week's fight
- Kids' voices count, even if adults still decide
- You can pass on any item
- Nobody gets ambushed — issues go on the agenda before the meeting
This week's agenda item
Brought by
Outcome
Boring on purpose
Family meetings work because they're predictable. The magic is not the content — it's the reliability of the container.