CRAFT — Community Reinforcement & Family Training
The evidence-based alternative to detachment until they hit bottom
CRAFT (Meyers & Smith) is the evidence-based alternative to "detachment until they hit bottom." It uses positive reinforcement for sober behavior, removes accidental rewards for using, protects your own safety and wellbeing, and waits for the right moment to invite treatment.
The loved one (initials only) and what they're using
Sober / connected behaviors I want more of
Coming home on time, eating with the family, taking a walk, going to a meeting, calling sponsor, an honest conversation.
How I'll reinforce them
Warmth, eye contact, a shared meal, time together, a thank-you — small, specific, immediate, and only when sober/connected.
Rewards I'm currently giving when they use
Cooking their favorite meal, sex, money, smoothing it over with family, driving them, picking up the kids, calling in sick for them.
How I'll remove those rewards (safely)
Step out of the room when they're using, decline the conversation, don't argue while they're intoxicated, take the kids elsewhere.
My safety plan
Any current or potential violence, intoxicated driving, or risk to children. Where I go, who I call, and the line I won't cross.
My own life rebuild
CRAFT works only if I have a life of my own to come back to. What I'll re-add: friendships, movement, hobbies, support group, therapy, time off from monitoring them.
The treatment invitation — when and how
CRAFT waits for the right window: sober, calm, after a natural consequence has landed. What I'll say, what I'll offer (intake appointment already booked, a ride, going with them).