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What are the 6 Fs in IFS?

The 6 Fs in IFS are the six steps Internal Family Systems therapy uses to get to know a protector part: Find it, Focus on it, Flesh it out, notice how you Feel toward it, beFriend it, and explore its Fears. The first three help you unblend from the part; the last three build a relationship with it.

Source — Schwartz & Sweezy, Internal Family Systems Therapy (2nd ed.)

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IFS · Parts Work

The 6 Fs of IFS

Find, Focus, Flesh out, Feel toward, beFriend, Fears

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The 6 Fs are the steps for getting to know a protector part in Internal Family Systems. The first three help you unblend (step back). The last three help you build a relationship with the part. Go slowly. Stop whenever you feel overwhelmed and come back to it with your therapist.

The part I'm getting to know

A working name, e.g. "the planner" or "the part that scrolls".

1FindUnblend

Where do you notice this part — in your body, around your body, or in your mind?

A tight jaw, a voice, an image, an urge. Just locate it.

2FocusUnblend

Turn your attention toward it. What do you notice as you stay with it?

Shift from being it to looking at it.

3Flesh it outUnblend

What does it look, sound or feel like? How old does it seem? What does it say?

Shape, colour, age, posture, words.

4Feel towardBefriend

How do you feel toward this part right now?

If the answer isn't curious, calm or open, another part has stepped in. Ask that part to give some space.

5BeFriendBefriend

Let it know you're here. What is its job? How long has it done it? What does it want you to know?

Get to know it the way you would a new colleague.

6FearsBefriend

What is it afraid would happen if it stopped doing its job?

The fear usually points to what — or who — it is protecting.

Before and after

How blended I felt at the start
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How blended I feel now
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Curiosity toward the part now
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Something I want to say back to this part

References & further reading

Conceptual background and further reading, not validation of this handout. Named instruments and methods belong to their original authors; custom prompts and trackers are not validated versions of those instruments.

  • Schwartz, R. C., & Sweezy, M. (2019). Internal Family Systems Therapy (2nd ed.). Guilford Press.
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About this worksheet

The 6 Fs are the core sequence for working with protectors in Internal Family Systems (IFS). A protector is a part that tries to keep you safe, such as a critic, a planner, or a part that numbs out. Instead of fighting it, the 6 Fs help you turn toward it with curiosity. Find, Focus and Flesh out shift you from being the part to noticing the part. That shift is called unblending. Feel toward is the checkpoint: if you feel anything other than curious, calm or open toward the part, another part has stepped in, and you ask it to give some space. BeFriend and Fears build trust: you learn the part's job, how long it has done it, and what it fears would happen if it stopped. That fear usually points to the exile the part protects. Clinicians often use the 6 Fs as the first structured parts exercise after a parts map. This worksheet walks through each step with prompts and before-and-after ratings.

When to use it

  • After introducing parts language, when one protector keeps showing up.
  • When a client says 'part of me' and you want a structured way to follow it.
  • As homework between sessions, once the client can unblend in session.
  • Not as a way to reach exiles alone. If a client floods, return to grounding and work with a therapist.

How to use it

  1. 1
    Find

    Locate the part in or around the body, or as a thought, image or urge.

  2. 2
    Focus

    Turn attention toward it. This alone often creates a little distance.

  3. 3
    Flesh it out

    Describe it: shape, age, words, posture. The more specific, the more separate it feels.

  4. 4
    Feel toward

    Check how you feel toward it. Anything but curiosity or calm means another part is blended; ask that part to step back.

  5. 5
    BeFriend

    Ask about its job and what it wants you to know. Thank it for working hard.

  6. 6
    Fears

    Ask what it fears would happen if it stopped. Note the answer; don't push past it.

Frequently asked questions

What are the 6 Fs of IFS?+

Find, Focus, Flesh out, Feel toward, beFriend, and Fears. They're the steps IFS uses to unblend from a protector part and then get to know it.

What is the purpose of the 6 Fs?+

To help you relate to a part instead of being taken over by it. The first three steps create space (unblending); the last three build trust so the part may later allow access to what it protects.

What does 'feel toward' mean in IFS?+

It's the check for whether Self is present. If you feel curious, calm or compassionate toward the part, Self is leading. If you feel annoyed, scared or want it gone, that's another part, and you ask it to step aside first.

Can I do the 6 Fs on my own?+

Many people use them gently on their own with protectors. Work with exiles and trauma is best done with a trained IFS therapist.

Is there a 6 Fs worksheet PDF?+

Yes. The worksheet on this page is free to download as a PDF and can be sent to clients from a TherapistAssist account.

Worksheet — The 6 Fs of IFS — provided by TherapistAssist for clinical use. Not a substitute for assessment or treatment.