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Who Am I? — Identity Worksheet

A set of angles on identity for chapters when the old answer no longer fits

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For identity work — after a role ends, a relationship ends, recovery begins, kids leave, a diagnosis lands, or the person the client has been performing no longer fits. Not one answer; a set of angles.

Ten short 'I am ___' statements — write fast, don't edit
Roles I hold (parent, partner, worker, friend, child, patient…)
Which of these feel like me, and which feel like a costume?
What I care about, that I'd care about even if no one was watching
What I'm good at that I take for granted
What I'm still figuring out about myself
A part of me I've been hiding, and why
What the version of me at age 80 would want me to know now
One sentence: who I am, right now, in this chapter
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About this worksheet

For identity work — the chapter after a role ends, a relationship ends, recovery begins, kids leave, a diagnosis lands, or the person the client has been performing no longer fits. Not one answer; a set of angles. Ten fast 'I am ___' statements written without editing (speed bypasses the internal editor), roles the client currently holds and which feel like a costume, values they'd hold even if no one was watching, strengths they take for granted, what they're still figuring out, a part they've been hiding and why, what the 80-year-old version would want them to know, and — after all the angles — one sentence naming who they are in this chapter. Not final. Just this chapter.

When to use it

  • Life transitions — career change, divorce, retirement, empty nest.
  • Early recovery when the addicted identity is leaving and the new one isn't set.
  • Coming out, gender transition, cultural identity work.
  • Chronic illness diagnosis where identity has to include the new reality.
  • Post-caregiving, post-parenting, post-military transitions.

How to use it

  1. 1
    Do the 'I am' statements fast

    60 seconds, ten items, no editing. Speed matters — it bypasses the curated self.

  2. 2
    Sort roles from costumes

    Not 'which roles do I like' — which feel like me and which feel like performance. That distinction is the material.

  3. 3
    Find values that don't need an audience

    'What would I still care about if no one was watching?' Strips performance from identity.

  4. 4
    Meet the hidden part

    'A part of me I've been hiding is ___, because ___.' Gentle. This is the field clients most often skip; it's usually the most useful.

  5. 5
    The chapter sentence

    One sentence. Not final. Just this chapter. Clients often return to this sentence months later and rewrite it — that's the point.

Frequently asked questions

Is this a values worksheet?+

Related but distinct. Values worksheets ask what matters. This worksheet asks who I am, which includes values plus roles, strengths, hidden parts, and self-narrative. They pair well.

When shouldn't I use this?+

Not for acute crisis, active psychosis, or dissociative presentations without stabilization. Identity work presupposes enough regulation to hold multiple selves without fragmenting.

Is this the same as parts work?+

It's a lighter-touch cousin. Real IFS parts work meets each part in dialogue; this worksheet surfaces which parts and roles exist so the client and clinician know what to work with next.

Is this worksheet free?+

Yes. Free printable PDF. Sign in to TherapistAssist to send as a secure client link.

Worksheet — Who Am I? — Identity Worksheet — provided by TherapistAssist for clinical use. Not a substitute for assessment or treatment.