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Universal · Depression

Feeling Stuck in Life

Name the cost, meet the protector, choose the first honest step

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About this worksheet

Stuckness rarely responds to a to-do list — most clients who feel stuck already know several things they 'should' do. What they usually need first is to name the unnamed cost of staying, meet the part of them that doesn't want to move, and hear what that part is protecting them from. This worksheet slows the whole picture down: the situation in one sentence, what's already been tried, what's lost if nothing changes and what's lost if things do change (this pair alone often surfaces the block), the protector part and what it would need to hear, and then — only then — the smallest honest experiment for the week. Not the whole answer; the first square inch. Ends with an accountability move so the experiment doesn't dissolve back into the loop.

When to use it

  • Depression where the client 'knows what to do' but can't move.
  • Career or relationship inertia, midlife re-evaluation.
  • Ambivalence about a change the client keeps circling — a job, a partner, a diet, a move.
  • IFS-informed work: surfaces the protector part before behavior planning.

How to use it

  1. 1
    Name the stuck in one sentence

    If it takes a paragraph, the client isn't stuck on one thing — split it.

  2. 2
    Cost of staying vs cost of moving

    Both columns. The cost of moving is usually what the protector is holding — that's the material.

  3. 3
    Meet the protector

    'The part of me that doesn't want to move is protecting me from ___.' Curiosity, not argument.

  4. 4
    The smallest honest experiment

    Under 30 minutes, this week, doable without new resources. Small enough that the protector doesn't need to block it.

  5. 5
    Tell someone

    Naming the experiment out loud is what prevents it dissolving back into the loop.

Frequently asked questions

Is this a depression worksheet?+

It's useful in depression, particularly with clients whose depression presents as inertia rather than sadness. Also fits ambivalence, midlife stuckness, and clients between chapters.

How is this different from behavioral activation?+

Behavioral activation schedules valued action to lift mood. This worksheet works one layer up — why the client can't yet schedule the action. They pair well: this sheet first, then BA once the block loosens.

What if the client can't name the protector?+

That's the finding. Sit with 'if I had to guess what a part of me is worried would happen, what would it be?' — protectors reveal themselves under gentle guessing.

Is this worksheet free?+

Yes. Free printable PDF. Sign in to TherapistAssist to send as a secure client link.

Related worksheets

Worksheet — Feeling Stuck in Life — provided by TherapistAssist for clinical use. Not a substitute for assessment or treatment.